Baby refusing the breast? Try Co-Bathing to help

How nice is a warm relaxing bath? Oh, the thought of it is making me want to run one now, especially with winter drawing in! Now imagine sharing that experience with your baby… Yes, it is a lush experience, but there is another reason I mention it. ‘Co-bathing’ is a brilliant recipe for any baby who may be refusing the breast or any new mum having difficulty breastfeeding. Co-bathing can reap many rewards. So read on and I’ll tell you all about it.

Sometimes through no fault of yours or theirs, your baby may become fussy and upset easily at the breast. This is often caused by a difficult labour and birth, drugs in labour or perhaps some overzealous attachment techniques at the breast in the first few hours/days. Sometimes, this can lead to a baby pushing away at the breast, becoming frustrated, upset and refusing to feed. This can also lead to a mother feeling inadequate and that she cannot breastfeed. This is not the case! A baby needs to think of the breast as a nice place to be, if he has been forced there or made to breastfeed while he had a sore head it will likely make him feel it is not such a nice place to be! There are several ways to help with these issues, which I shall blog about over the next few weeks, but co-bathing is my favourite and nicest way.

Relaxing in the warm bath water together can allow baby to feel relaxed at the breast again. I call it a ‘re-birthing’. This action mimics the baby being back in the womb and helps to wipe their memory of feeling anxious at the breast, allowing their natural instinct to take over again. I have had many strange looks from the mums I have shared this information with, but a few days later there is often only smiles.

How to help overcome Breast Refusal with a bath

• Fill the bath fairly full with warm water – the same temperature as recommended on your newborn’s bath thermometer.
• Warm the bathroom (if it is winter).
• Ensure you have another adult on hand to help you lift baby in and out of the bath for safety.
• Relax in the bath and place baby on his stomach lying between your breasts.
• Sing and talk calmly to your baby, let the tears flow if they need to. This is OK, it can be very emotional if your baby has, up until now, been screaming at the breast.
• Keep baby warm by gently having your partner pour the warm water over baby’s back.
• RELAX together and enjoy.
• Watch as your baby starts to bob his head up and down searching for the breast. Encourage him with soft words, so he knows mum is relaxed and that this is a good place to be.
• Perhaps squeeze out a little milk to encourage him to find the breast.
• Support your baby behind his shoulders and bottom as he moves to find the breast, attach, and feed.
• Take 5 deep breaths to R.E.L.A.X and allow your milk to flow as your baby feeds calmly.
• Enjoy the time breastfeeding together before you get out of the bath.

This may take more than once to get baby back onto the breast and feeding well again, so repeat daily if possible, until feeding well. At other times, when you are not in the bath together, try feeding in the same laid back position, allowing baby to gently find the breast and use his instincts. Babies quite like to do it themselves! See the wonderful Suzanne Colson’s website on Biological Nurturing (laid-back breastfeeding style) http://www.biologicalnurturing.com/pages/recipe.html

Having a calm approach when your baby is frustrated at the breast can be extremely difficult, using this bathing technique can help to relax you first and in turn really help your breastfeeding relationship with your baby.

As always, please make sure you get help from a good Lactation Consultant, Midwife, or Maternal Child Health nurse for any breastfeeding difficulties if you feel need some extra support.